Spirit Castle. Where princess Madison will grow up.
Kind of looks like a castle at night...a modern castle? Hahaha
I'm all Disney'd out today. Not only have my daughter and I been watching Disney movies, but in between and afterwards we were listening to Disney songs.
Mommy then however made the mistake of picking out a horror movie about a demon baby to watch while Madison was napping. Do not ever watch It's Alive...Or Gracie. For the love of god, I only further scarred myself.
Seriously Scarred me for life...
So why I was then willing to watch this...
I swear to you, I will never know.
There's something about horror movies though. You know that they're not real, and for some reason all the terrible things that happen sort of just make you feel better about your life, Because none of them are happening to me, and the more supernatural you get, the easier it is to separate fiction from reality.
I love horror movies, but now that I am a mother there are just some things I can't handle. Like demon babies, or kidnappings, rapes, torture. Do you see a theme here? Do you understand how many horror movies that cuts out for me.
But..being a mother, I understand why I feel that way. It's one thing to have no self preservation. I can not however ignore the fact that if anything even remotely evil or harmful touched my daughter, I would lose it.
I also am now hypocritical in the since that, as a child I started watching horror movies as early back as I can remember. My daughter however will not be subjected to these things until see's old enough to understand it for what it is, and decide if she even wants to fill her brain with those images. There are just some things you can't unsee.
Speaking of which, let's move on to more positive outlooks. Like today, I went to the DMV to apply for my new DL with my new married name on it. I can not wait to have a picture I.D. with my new name on it. I haven't really felt like we were married, a real husband wife yet. What with all the stress we've had in our lives lately. But seeing that picture of me, with his name under it. It will feel official. More official to me.
Then hopefully the next step, us getting a home together. Will be the final. We will finally be able to feel like a real married couple, and a happy safe little family. Where mommy can curl up in daddies arms, in there own room where Madi can't see, and watch the few scary movies left that in the world, that I can stand to watch.
Hopeful Mother. Of. Madison.
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